Alive and well. . . Maybe

Alive, yes. Well. . . that's harder to answer. It's been 6 months since I've updated this blog and the reason is. . . knowing what I want to say and how to say it has been harder than usual. 6 months in Bolivia, anywhere really, has this way of completely changing your world, your life, your perspective, you. A different you means different feelings and different ways of communicating those feelings. "How is it being back?" "Did you love it?" "Tell me all about it", these are a few of the questions that seem nice and harmless to most, but send me into a spiraling panic. . . sounds weird right? 6 months, in the grand scheme of things, doesn't seem like it would be all that long, but when I'm faced with compressing it down into 'small talk' it feels like an eternity. The faces, the people, the places, the kids. . . it's all too much. All of those things, and so much more were used by God in those 6 months to show me a lifetime of revelations. He showed me things about myself, about His word, His plan and where I fit into it, His people and most importantly, He showed me more of Himself. I realized not only what I can do and what I am capable of, but what I can do in Him and what He can accomplish through me when I step out of the way and let Him. So, am I well? Yes, I feel that I am, what I'm not is comfortable and in all honesty, I kinda love that! It lets me know that standing still is not what God is calling me to, that He is calling me out and waiting for me to respond. So although the first step in my journey has come to an end, I continue to pray, and ask for yours, as I seek the next step God already has planned for me in this beautiful and wonderful adventure called life.
"No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, He may give it to you." -John 15:15-16